What am I doing here?

*tap tap* Is this thing on?

So how do I start? Dear diary? Or wait, do I talk about Eric in the third person?

Screw it. I’m just going to put pen to paper. Or fingers to keys I guess would be the more accurate way to say it. No gimmicks for this guy.

Who am I?

I’m a single dad, the lucky father of 3 amazing children. While there are moments when they test my ability to call them my offspring (or to consider them human for that matter), I honestly couldn’t live without them.

Over the last 2 years I’ve been suffering through the divorce process. I don’t say “suffering” because there is a vicious, heartless ex-wife that is harvesting my very soul along with every dollar I earn, that would be absurd and wrong on many counts. I use the word suffering because no matter how easy, or smooth, or even wonderfully timed a divorce may be, it is difficult, horribly painful and depressing. The social norms, family expectations, personal goals and other static that make a marriage tough to maintain, all combine to amplify the burden of divorce.┬áPlus, I’m my own worst critic. I’ve got more of my own boot-prints in my ribs than anyone else’s. Remind me to stop doing that.

Dating? Um, yes. That’s a mixed bag. Expect a post or two about that.

So here is me in a nutshell – I was raised by 4 sisters (like being raised by wolves, only instead of claws and teeth, they had eyeliner and mascara), I LOVE to laugh, I work as a professional, I’m physically active (runner, skier, mountain biker, rugged mountain man), outgoing, inquisitive, social, warm and friendly, love good conversation and can be insanely immature at times.

I laugh at my own jokes and sometimes make others choke on their food. I’m also the kind of guy that picks up other peoples trash and honks when people throw their cigarette buts out the car window. Littering is for selfish pricks – this is my city too. I do have a serious side but I try to keep that personality locked up and gagged in the closet.

Why am I here?

I’m not even sure it I know the answer yet. Ultimately I have discovered writing to be a pretty good therapist (and a cheap one too). If someone happens to benefit from what I jot down – that’s great for them. When it comes to this blog, I don’t have any goals to achieve, objectives to accomplish, or agendas to complete. Its just a place to store my life experiences, as simple or as complex as they may be.

The one thing you will not find here is trash talk about my kids mom. If that’s what you came for – sympathy hatred, commiseration, someone to sit and stew with – then you’ll be severely disappointed. She’s a great mom, she loves her kids, and while I could likely write a book on what she could change about herself (it would be entirely an opinion piece), she is everything they need to grow up to be good, healthy, contributing members of society. We are already outnumbered – I’d rather have her as an ally in raising my kids rather than an enemy.

Well, first post done. Stick around for more. Or don’t. I’ll be here either way.

Comments 7

  1. Good on you. You sound like a great person. An amazing dad. Believe it and don’t beat yourself up so much.

  2. Very well written, Eric. I applaud you for choosing not to say anything negative about your ex. In that end, it accomplishs nothing and only ends up hurting the children in the end.

    1. Thanks Tasha, throwing insults usually hurts the one throwing them more than anyone. And you are right, the kids don’t deserve to be drug into something like that.

  3. Eric, I’m very sorry to hear you are going through this process. I can’t say I know what you’re going through nor can I say it’s going to be alright in the end. But from what I’ve just read, your not JUST a single dad, you’re your kids dad and you sound like a selfless one to think of them first by protecting them from the fall outs of a divorce. Good on you and I look forward in reading more from your blog.

    1. I agree Dale, I’m more than “just” a single dad ;). Sometimes though, looking at things from a specific perspective helps define things. I look forward to hearing more of your comments!

  4. I applaud you in this. When I experienced my divorce, writing was indeed therapy. What also works is talking things through with others. Forget the fact that I am in Calgary, if ever I could serve in that spot, let me know.

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